It's 1 am, and we just got back from the ER. Jacob's breathing kind of deteriorated, or at least it seemed so to us, so we took him in about 10 pm. We were done by 11:30 pm, but as we were walking out the door, the nurse ran back to us and said, "Wait, did we give him his first dose of prednisolone yet?" Um, no. We were walking out with a prescription for oral prednisolone, and I don't know what we thought we would do with it, because as I mentioned in my last post, Jacob doesn't do oral medicine.
So, we try the medicine cup. Then we try the syringe. Several times. Heath holds him down and gives the dose. I hold him down and Heath gives the dose. I hold him and the nurse gives the dose. Same gargling and spitting scenerio described in my last post. Finally, the doctor comes in and says, "You are taking the medicine. Either you will drink it, or I will give you a shot." So Jacob tries to drink it himself, in little bitty sips with much shuddering and much of the medicine leaking out the sides of his mouth. He's almost to the bottom of the medicine cup when he throws up all over himself and the bed.
So, we got the shot. He has viral croup on top of the flu, so that explains the horrible sounding cough despite the doctor saying his lungs were clear this morning and despite regular albuterol treatments. We were worried his blood oxygen levels would be down in the high 80's - low 90's by the time we got there, because of how he sounded, but he was between 95-97% when we got there, and up to 99-100% by the time we left. So that was reassuring. Also, the hour of struggling over oral medicine was confirmation that not getting the Tamiflu was probably a good choice.
I almost forgot to mention - my brother Jeff came over to stay with Ethan while we took Jacob to the hospital. Ethan was sound asleep, but woke up right as we were leaving, and cried for us for over an hour. Jeff couldn't get Ethan to be quiet long enough to realize who he was. Finally Jeff says to Ethan, "Do you like football?" (knowing he does). "Yes," Ethan says. (Apparently Ethan decided it was okay to talk to the strange man if it was about football.) Jeff says, "Did you know Uncle Jeff used to play football?" "You did?!" Ethan says. Jeff said it only took about 2 minutes of football storytelling before Ethan was peacefully back to sleep. He woke up a couple more times before we got home, and briefly cried out; but then he cried out "Uncle Jeff!" instead of "Mommy! Daddy!"
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Monday, February 12, 2007
flu!
Jacob has the flu! No, I didn't get him the flu shot. I'm sorry. He's never been this sedate in his life. Which is good in a way, because we will be confined to the house for the next week or so while he is contagious.
I was excited about the possibility of getting him Tamiflu, until I found out that it only reduces the duration of the virus by a median of 1.3 days, and it doesn't do anything for the symptoms while the virus lasts. When I found out our insurance co-pay was $60, I decided the likelihood that Jacob would spit all the medicine back at us rather than swallowing it outweighed the potential benefit. If we only had to give it for a couple of days and then the flu would be gone, that would have been worth it. Giving it twice a day for 5 days with a chance he'll get over it in 6 days instead of 7 wasn't as appealing.
(We have not been able to get him to take any medicine by mouth for over a year. I know you're thinking we probably didn't try hard enough, but if I could show you some kind of flashback video of those moments... Holding him down while we used a medicine syringe to slowly dispense the liquid into the back pocket of his cheek, where it is supposed to be almost impossible for someone not to swallow it, but instead he gargles the medicine until it all leaks out the corners of his mouth or sputters out onto our faces and clothes.)
I was excited about the possibility of getting him Tamiflu, until I found out that it only reduces the duration of the virus by a median of 1.3 days, and it doesn't do anything for the symptoms while the virus lasts. When I found out our insurance co-pay was $60, I decided the likelihood that Jacob would spit all the medicine back at us rather than swallowing it outweighed the potential benefit. If we only had to give it for a couple of days and then the flu would be gone, that would have been worth it. Giving it twice a day for 5 days with a chance he'll get over it in 6 days instead of 7 wasn't as appealing.
(We have not been able to get him to take any medicine by mouth for over a year. I know you're thinking we probably didn't try hard enough, but if I could show you some kind of flashback video of those moments... Holding him down while we used a medicine syringe to slowly dispense the liquid into the back pocket of his cheek, where it is supposed to be almost impossible for someone not to swallow it, but instead he gargles the medicine until it all leaks out the corners of his mouth or sputters out onto our faces and clothes.)
Friday, February 02, 2007
MLM peeve - my public service announcement
I just talked to my Mom about a phone call she had last night with someone selling for a certain multi-level-marketing company (the nice way to say "pyramid scheme"). There are several things that really, really bug me about these companies. First of all, whatever their product is, they have a spiel about how it will, basically, revolutionize your existence. They tell you about a problem you didn't even know you had and their fantastic solution to the problem. Many of these companies probably do have exceptional, wonderful products. Just don't give me outlandish reasons why I need it or claims about how it will change my life. It is just a vitamin, or household cleaner, or cosmetic, or whatever, anyway.
Even if there is no outlandish marketing of the product, the other thing that bugs me is that the point isn't just to convince you to buy a little bit of the product to try, or even to become a regular customer. The ultimate point is to convince you to start selling it, too. If you don't want to sell it, then you are encouraged to at least purchase a wholesale membership or something of the sort, where you get a great discount, but are required to purchase a certain amount each month or year. If you already use the product and know you are going to purchase a certain amount in a certain time period, then you could easily figure if it would make sense to purchase the wholesale membership and get the discount. But since you are just now hearing about the product and trying it for the first time, there is no way to know, and I am guessing that more often than not people end up spending more when purchasing the wholesale membership. Why else would the company push it so much?
My final gripe with these companies is their claim to be "Christian companies." I understand that the founders may be Christians, and many of the salespeople/members may also be Christians. But I believe this label is used to inspire faith in the company that is unwarranted. The sales presentations these companies do are most often quite biased, and often entice people to spend money they don't have or to make commitments that they shouldn't make, and at the very least imply financial or health benefits that are rarely delivered.
I will give two examples from my own life. When we lived in another city, an elder from our church wanted to talk to us about his particular company. We decided to hear him out. If you listen carefully to these presentations, you will usually find a way that the logic doesn't really apply to you. This company sold a variety of household products, cosmetics, etc. The minimum "investment" you were required to make each month in the company was around $200 - i.e. you needed to purchase that much of the various products each month in order to start selling the program to others and making money off the $200 they purchased each month, and the $200 they convinced their friends to purchase each month, etc. etc. But, of course, they try not to emphasize that getting your friends to buy into the program is a major part of how it works. So instead, the logic is, "Well, you probably already spend this much each month on these sort of products; why not spend it with our company instead of at Walmart or wherever, and get better products at the same time. Oh, and when you just naturally introduce your friends to the new products you are so impressed with, and they decide to try it, too, you'll get a percent of what they spend."
The conversation pretty much ended for us there. We were poor college kids. No way did we spend $200/mo. on household products and cosmetics. In fact, I had a detailed spreadsheet of what we did spend on those products, and it was less than $25/mo. Generic everything. (Even now, we probably spend less than $35/mo. We make up for it by eating out way too much.)
Another time a friend tried to get me to buy into her makeup company. She loved the products and let me try them for a week before presenting the "opportunity" to me. They were great products; I'll give you that. But I don't spend $75/mo. on my face. I just don't. Maybe there will be a point in my life when that will seem necessary or reasonable, but at that point I probably wouldn't be buying from a MLM company, because I'd just go to the makeup counter of a department store or something since I wouldn't need the money from selling the product/program myself.
Both of the people who presented their programs were people I liked and respected and were also fellow believers. It didn't change my opinion of them that they were involved in these programs, apparently it worked out well for them and they were pleased with their involvement. But the fact that I didn't buy into the programs - financially or intellectually - put some strain in the relationships. Kind of limited the relationships, really. And that was too bad.
So, there it is. My public service announcement warning you about multi-level-marketing companies. Please don't let anyone pressure you into joining one of these organizations - give yourself time to think it through and research the claims and do the math to see if it really is something you want to be involved with.
Even if there is no outlandish marketing of the product, the other thing that bugs me is that the point isn't just to convince you to buy a little bit of the product to try, or even to become a regular customer. The ultimate point is to convince you to start selling it, too. If you don't want to sell it, then you are encouraged to at least purchase a wholesale membership or something of the sort, where you get a great discount, but are required to purchase a certain amount each month or year. If you already use the product and know you are going to purchase a certain amount in a certain time period, then you could easily figure if it would make sense to purchase the wholesale membership and get the discount. But since you are just now hearing about the product and trying it for the first time, there is no way to know, and I am guessing that more often than not people end up spending more when purchasing the wholesale membership. Why else would the company push it so much?
My final gripe with these companies is their claim to be "Christian companies." I understand that the founders may be Christians, and many of the salespeople/members may also be Christians. But I believe this label is used to inspire faith in the company that is unwarranted. The sales presentations these companies do are most often quite biased, and often entice people to spend money they don't have or to make commitments that they shouldn't make, and at the very least imply financial or health benefits that are rarely delivered.
I will give two examples from my own life. When we lived in another city, an elder from our church wanted to talk to us about his particular company. We decided to hear him out. If you listen carefully to these presentations, you will usually find a way that the logic doesn't really apply to you. This company sold a variety of household products, cosmetics, etc. The minimum "investment" you were required to make each month in the company was around $200 - i.e. you needed to purchase that much of the various products each month in order to start selling the program to others and making money off the $200 they purchased each month, and the $200 they convinced their friends to purchase each month, etc. etc. But, of course, they try not to emphasize that getting your friends to buy into the program is a major part of how it works. So instead, the logic is, "Well, you probably already spend this much each month on these sort of products; why not spend it with our company instead of at Walmart or wherever, and get better products at the same time. Oh, and when you just naturally introduce your friends to the new products you are so impressed with, and they decide to try it, too, you'll get a percent of what they spend."
The conversation pretty much ended for us there. We were poor college kids. No way did we spend $200/mo. on household products and cosmetics. In fact, I had a detailed spreadsheet of what we did spend on those products, and it was less than $25/mo. Generic everything. (Even now, we probably spend less than $35/mo. We make up for it by eating out way too much.)
Another time a friend tried to get me to buy into her makeup company. She loved the products and let me try them for a week before presenting the "opportunity" to me. They were great products; I'll give you that. But I don't spend $75/mo. on my face. I just don't. Maybe there will be a point in my life when that will seem necessary or reasonable, but at that point I probably wouldn't be buying from a MLM company, because I'd just go to the makeup counter of a department store or something since I wouldn't need the money from selling the product/program myself.
Both of the people who presented their programs were people I liked and respected and were also fellow believers. It didn't change my opinion of them that they were involved in these programs, apparently it worked out well for them and they were pleased with their involvement. But the fact that I didn't buy into the programs - financially or intellectually - put some strain in the relationships. Kind of limited the relationships, really. And that was too bad.
So, there it is. My public service announcement warning you about multi-level-marketing companies. Please don't let anyone pressure you into joining one of these organizations - give yourself time to think it through and research the claims and do the math to see if it really is something you want to be involved with.
several unrelated thoughts for the day
I had an OB appointment today, and my blood pressure registered high. Not cool with my history of preeclampsia. I was surprised, because I have been measuring it here at home, and it has been fine. So the doctor started asking, have you had headaches, blurred vision, etc. (other symptoms of preeclampsia), and I told her that I've just had headaches with a cold for the last couple of days. She says, "Did you take anything this morning?" When I told her I had taken Sudafed, she said that explained the abnormally high blood pressure. I had forgotten that decongestants could raise your blood pressure. I wasn't really worried, since it has been measuring fine at home, but it was nice to find an explanation so quickly and easily. Smart doctor. :-) I also found out I get to have another sonogram at 30 weeks to make sure I don't have placenta previa (the placenta was low-lying at my first sonogram). I've never had a sonogram so late in the pregnancy, so that will be fun (assuming it doesn't show placenta previa, which would necessitate a c-section).
Also, I am feeling surprisingly better today. Heath let me get lots of sleep once he got home yesterday, and I'm sure it helped my immune system to knock down the virus quite a bit.
I had the chance to talk to a friend over lunch today at McD's, and was reminded that even if you have family in town it doesn't mean you always have babysitters when you need them. Both her parents and in-laws are in town, but both of the grandmas work. She said her husband usually has to take off work for her if she is really sick, too. Thank God for flexible jobs. So that added a little more perspective to help me to let go of my pity party. Sorry to be so self-centered yesterday.
We just had a guy deliver a truck load of firewood. I am so excited. Anyone want to come over and enjoy a fire with us? :-)
Also, I am feeling surprisingly better today. Heath let me get lots of sleep once he got home yesterday, and I'm sure it helped my immune system to knock down the virus quite a bit.
I had the chance to talk to a friend over lunch today at McD's, and was reminded that even if you have family in town it doesn't mean you always have babysitters when you need them. Both her parents and in-laws are in town, but both of the grandmas work. She said her husband usually has to take off work for her if she is really sick, too. Thank God for flexible jobs. So that added a little more perspective to help me to let go of my pity party. Sorry to be so self-centered yesterday.
We just had a guy deliver a truck load of firewood. I am so excited. Anyone want to come over and enjoy a fire with us? :-)
Thursday, February 01, 2007
my pity party, aka stay-at-home moms don't get sick days
Attention all Grandmas, Aunts, etc. to my children: Will someone please move to our city?
We knew when we made the decision to move that it would be hard not to be near family. But on days like today, I feel the loss almost more than I can stand.
I am really sick with a cold today. It's one thing to not feel up to doing any work. I don't even feel up to reading or talking or watching TV. I managed to lay in bed for a couple of hours, with the TV on Nick Jr. in our room, luring the kids to stay in there with me - though thankfully they didn't just vege in front of the TV the entire time, they brought their toys in with them and played. They also brought in their snacks, which are now scattered all over our bedroom carpet. But at least during those 2 hours, they didn't demand much and they didn't fight much, because I had little to no strength to break up fights or fulfill requests. I got up and tried to provide some nutritious food around lunch time, and now that I have been mostly upright this afternoon, the demands and fighting have begun. So in response to my pleading, Heath is coming home to take care of them for the last half of the afternoon.
I so wish I was one of those people who never get sick. Or one of those people who actually did well on 6 or 7 hours of sleep. But instead, I seem to get sick way more than everyone else, and need way more sleep, even when I'm not pregnant.
We have a babysitter in the neighborhood who we use for a few hours here and there when we really need to, but for a full day it would cost $67.50. Heath has lots of paid time off, which he didn't even come close to using up last year, but it's not really ideal for him to take sick days for me. We have friends we've made over the last year and a half, but they have kids at home and complicated schedules for school and activity pick ups and drop offs, and it would be a major inconvenience to them to take my kids for a whole day, especially on short notice. So we're back to the bottom line - stay-at-home moms don't get sick days. Even though when I was paid to work, I would have most certainly been lying in my bed at home all day when I felt this way.
I do really appreciate that I have the opportunity to stay home with my kids, and I do love being home with them, most of the time. I'm just having trouble being thankful in all circumstances today, so I know I need to work on that. I know I need a major attitude adjustment; I just haven't figured out how to accomplish it yet. I also need to work on my inability to ask people for help (which I think is related to my inability to determine if I really need help or if I am somehow shirking my responsibility and just need to suck it up - although today I know I was beyond just needing to suck it up). But despite that, I truly couldn't think of anyone that it would have been "fair" to ask to take the kids today. Thus, my request for relatives to move to town. Like, across the street would be good. Any takers?
We knew when we made the decision to move that it would be hard not to be near family. But on days like today, I feel the loss almost more than I can stand.
I am really sick with a cold today. It's one thing to not feel up to doing any work. I don't even feel up to reading or talking or watching TV. I managed to lay in bed for a couple of hours, with the TV on Nick Jr. in our room, luring the kids to stay in there with me - though thankfully they didn't just vege in front of the TV the entire time, they brought their toys in with them and played. They also brought in their snacks, which are now scattered all over our bedroom carpet. But at least during those 2 hours, they didn't demand much and they didn't fight much, because I had little to no strength to break up fights or fulfill requests. I got up and tried to provide some nutritious food around lunch time, and now that I have been mostly upright this afternoon, the demands and fighting have begun. So in response to my pleading, Heath is coming home to take care of them for the last half of the afternoon.
I so wish I was one of those people who never get sick. Or one of those people who actually did well on 6 or 7 hours of sleep. But instead, I seem to get sick way more than everyone else, and need way more sleep, even when I'm not pregnant.
We have a babysitter in the neighborhood who we use for a few hours here and there when we really need to, but for a full day it would cost $67.50. Heath has lots of paid time off, which he didn't even come close to using up last year, but it's not really ideal for him to take sick days for me. We have friends we've made over the last year and a half, but they have kids at home and complicated schedules for school and activity pick ups and drop offs, and it would be a major inconvenience to them to take my kids for a whole day, especially on short notice. So we're back to the bottom line - stay-at-home moms don't get sick days. Even though when I was paid to work, I would have most certainly been lying in my bed at home all day when I felt this way.
I do really appreciate that I have the opportunity to stay home with my kids, and I do love being home with them, most of the time. I'm just having trouble being thankful in all circumstances today, so I know I need to work on that. I know I need a major attitude adjustment; I just haven't figured out how to accomplish it yet. I also need to work on my inability to ask people for help (which I think is related to my inability to determine if I really need help or if I am somehow shirking my responsibility and just need to suck it up - although today I know I was beyond just needing to suck it up). But despite that, I truly couldn't think of anyone that it would have been "fair" to ask to take the kids today. Thus, my request for relatives to move to town. Like, across the street would be good. Any takers?
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
art museum
So, we decided to finally check out the art museum, after living
here almost a year and a half. There is a great kids area with art supplies, books, puppets, games. But beware venturing into other areas of the museum with kids! The guards seem to really hate kids.
here almost a year and a half. There is a great kids area with art supplies, books, puppets, games. But beware venturing into other areas of the museum with kids! The guards seem to really hate kids.
 Here is Jacob designing a city on the magnet wall. |
 And here is Ethan venturing up the stairs to the non-kid areas, uh-oh... |
 And resignedly going back into the kids' area. |
Friday, January 26, 2007
thou shalt not covet
Why is it so hard to resist wanting things? Do people in other cultures, places, and times struggle with this the same way we do in modern America?
I said to Heath, jokingly the other night, "I am coveting Gina's enormous bathtub right now." But then we had a discussion about what coveting really is - is it just wanting something that someone else possesses, or is it the lust for more stuff in general? In the 10 commandments, God said not to covet your neighbor's things. So, what if I'm wanting something that is available to me in a store, not owned by my neighbor?
We'd probably all agree that lusting after more stuff in general is not a good thing. And I am actually quite happy with our home and our bathtub. :-) But sometimes I see things I want that I don't really need (depending on your definition of "need")... like a new area rug for the living room, or a new TV, or a new pair of shoes or pants. But really, what I want more than those things is to get our debts paid off and not accrue any more debt. So why is it so hard to not buy more stuff?
I said to Heath, jokingly the other night, "I am coveting Gina's enormous bathtub right now." But then we had a discussion about what coveting really is - is it just wanting something that someone else possesses, or is it the lust for more stuff in general? In the 10 commandments, God said not to covet your neighbor's things. So, what if I'm wanting something that is available to me in a store, not owned by my neighbor?
We'd probably all agree that lusting after more stuff in general is not a good thing. And I am actually quite happy with our home and our bathtub. :-) But sometimes I see things I want that I don't really need (depending on your definition of "need")... like a new area rug for the living room, or a new TV, or a new pair of shoes or pants. But really, what I want more than those things is to get our debts paid off and not accrue any more debt. So why is it so hard to not buy more stuff?
Monday, January 22, 2007
when it rains, it pours
My brother's dog, Roy, died yesterday at my mom's house. They were unable to bury him at the family farm because of the snow, so Jeff buried him in the backyard, after laboriously digging through the frozen ground. Roy was one of the two Weimaraners that have been like Jeff's children for the past decade or so. 
Saturday, January 20, 2007
have I lost my mind? (rhetorical question)
Disclaimer: I have debated for several months whether to post any of the feelings and thoughts that were growing in my mind regarding homeschooling, for fear of offending any of my dear friends or family. I decided to go ahead and post this after writing it, because it is just my feelings and thoughts, after all. I certainly don't condemn anyone else for following their convictions for their children. I recognize that each child and situation is different, and God may lead you differently than me for your situation.
This week was emotional, of course. But one thing that added to that emotion was being asked many times, "So, Jacob will start Kindergarten next year, won't he?"
I might as well have answered, "Oh, didn't you know we'd lost our minds and joined a radical sect?" Because telling people we plan on homeschooling goes over about as well. Those of you who read this blog are probably supportive and understanding of our desire to homeschool our children, but I think in a small town like ML, the issue is a lot more volatile. If I home school, I'm somehow rejecting the community's values or the expertise of the community's teachers. I think that is the perspective of the opposition, anyway. And if we lived in ML, maybe we would send our children to public school. I know most of the teachers personally, particularly my mom, and they are caring, talented people. But any public school, no matter how small and in what community, is still subject to state and national regulations that largely determine the flavor of the educational experience. Maybe this is why my Mom is supportive of us homeschooling. Public school has changed a lot since she started teaching over 30 years ago.
The heart of the matter for me, at this point, is this deep, genuine feeling (and feel free to think I am crazy, but this is how I feel), of "Why?" Why would I send Jacob to school next year? We're doing pretty well with the current situation, I think. I continue to protect and love and teach him as I have been these last four years. Why in the world would I want to discontinue that? Why would I feel the need to turn that responsiblity over to someone else at this point? He is still so young! You know, Heath's dad and my dad neither one attended Kindergarten - many of their generation didn't - and it still isn't mandatory in the state of Kansas. It isn't mandatory to be in an educational program until 7 years of age. So I could do absolutely nothing formal for Jacob's education for 2.5 more years. Of course I won't take that route, because he is eager to learn.
There are other factors, too, of course. I simply cannot imagine leaving him somewhere, under someone else's supervision (who is also supervising 20+ other children), for 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. I don't want to expose him to unsupervised peer interactions that could cause deep emotional or psychological hangups. I don't want him to be exposed to the attitudes and the filthy media that so many of the other children are exposed to at home. Again, he is so young still. Furthermore, I think Ethan would wilt with Jacob gone! They can hardly stand to be apart for an hour or two.
I come back to the question of, "Why would I send him?" To learn? To socialize? He already knows all of his letters and letter sounds, and he wants to learn words. He counts to 30 (skips a few numbers sometimes, but he's getting there), and he writes all of his numbers. He has mastered most of the concepts in the Kindergarten workbook we are going through right now. He is beginning to learn about coins and bills, the calendar, reading a clock. He loves to learn. I would hate to squelch that love of learning with a program that either bored him or forced him to do activities or exercises that were tedious or uninteresting to him. We work with his level of and direction of interest and individualize his program, because we don't have to try to teach 20+ students at once. So I certainly am not concered that he is missing out on learning by not going to school. As for socialization, I think children are socialized much better in a setting of several families getting together, with various ages of children, and lots of parents around to intervene and help teach the children what is constructive or appropriate interaction and what is not. Do you remember how many of the kids acted when you were in school? ((Shudder)) That is not how I want my children to act, how I want them to learn to treat others or how I want them to be treated.
I know many people don't feel the way we do, and that is fine. Maybe I will change my perspective entirely in a few years. I know that children must become independent eventually; they must fend for themselves in the world eventually. I just feel the conviction that right now is not the time, yet, for my children.
This week was emotional, of course. But one thing that added to that emotion was being asked many times, "So, Jacob will start Kindergarten next year, won't he?"
I might as well have answered, "Oh, didn't you know we'd lost our minds and joined a radical sect?" Because telling people we plan on homeschooling goes over about as well. Those of you who read this blog are probably supportive and understanding of our desire to homeschool our children, but I think in a small town like ML, the issue is a lot more volatile. If I home school, I'm somehow rejecting the community's values or the expertise of the community's teachers. I think that is the perspective of the opposition, anyway. And if we lived in ML, maybe we would send our children to public school. I know most of the teachers personally, particularly my mom, and they are caring, talented people. But any public school, no matter how small and in what community, is still subject to state and national regulations that largely determine the flavor of the educational experience. Maybe this is why my Mom is supportive of us homeschooling. Public school has changed a lot since she started teaching over 30 years ago.
The heart of the matter for me, at this point, is this deep, genuine feeling (and feel free to think I am crazy, but this is how I feel), of "Why?" Why would I send Jacob to school next year? We're doing pretty well with the current situation, I think. I continue to protect and love and teach him as I have been these last four years. Why in the world would I want to discontinue that? Why would I feel the need to turn that responsiblity over to someone else at this point? He is still so young! You know, Heath's dad and my dad neither one attended Kindergarten - many of their generation didn't - and it still isn't mandatory in the state of Kansas. It isn't mandatory to be in an educational program until 7 years of age. So I could do absolutely nothing formal for Jacob's education for 2.5 more years. Of course I won't take that route, because he is eager to learn.
There are other factors, too, of course. I simply cannot imagine leaving him somewhere, under someone else's supervision (who is also supervising 20+ other children), for 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. I don't want to expose him to unsupervised peer interactions that could cause deep emotional or psychological hangups. I don't want him to be exposed to the attitudes and the filthy media that so many of the other children are exposed to at home. Again, he is so young still. Furthermore, I think Ethan would wilt with Jacob gone! They can hardly stand to be apart for an hour or two.
I come back to the question of, "Why would I send him?" To learn? To socialize? He already knows all of his letters and letter sounds, and he wants to learn words. He counts to 30 (skips a few numbers sometimes, but he's getting there), and he writes all of his numbers. He has mastered most of the concepts in the Kindergarten workbook we are going through right now. He is beginning to learn about coins and bills, the calendar, reading a clock. He loves to learn. I would hate to squelch that love of learning with a program that either bored him or forced him to do activities or exercises that were tedious or uninteresting to him. We work with his level of and direction of interest and individualize his program, because we don't have to try to teach 20+ students at once. So I certainly am not concered that he is missing out on learning by not going to school. As for socialization, I think children are socialized much better in a setting of several families getting together, with various ages of children, and lots of parents around to intervene and help teach the children what is constructive or appropriate interaction and what is not. Do you remember how many of the kids acted when you were in school? ((Shudder)) That is not how I want my children to act, how I want them to learn to treat others or how I want them to be treated.
I know many people don't feel the way we do, and that is fine. Maybe I will change my perspective entirely in a few years. I know that children must become independent eventually; they must fend for themselves in the world eventually. I just feel the conviction that right now is not the time, yet, for my children.
Monday, January 15, 2007
My maternal Grandma passed away at 12:30 last night. I found out this morning.
I remember as a child thinking that my grandparents just couldn't die - I couldn't fathom it, they were such a big part of my life. We saw my maternal grandparents almost every day, and they added richness to our lives and upbringing. As I've gotten older, and now have my own husband and children, I can see that of course it is the natural course of things that our grandparents aren't a part of our lives on this earth forever. However, my memory of her, and also of my grandpa who passed away a few years ago, will continue to impact me for the rest of my life.
Grandma served her family with all of her energy. She kept an immaculate house. As I mentioned, I was there almost every day growing up, and it was never in any way messy or dirty. She worked to create a peaceful atmosphere in her home, and the peace there was tangible. She cooked every meal, and made almost everything from scratch. I remember watching her roll out dough for homemade noodles, cinammon rolls, fig cookies, and pie crusts on her kitchen table. We all gathered around that table to visit and laugh - because there was always laughter when the family gathered around her table - and inevitably, to eat whatever goodies or meal she was cooking. Her home was inseparable from who she was, and when I think of her I almost always think of her in that context. When I think of how I want my home to be, I model it after her.
Grandma never sat down. This would, at times, annoy members of the family who wished she would allow herself to relax, maybe watch a show or play a game with the family. But instead, we gathered around her table to talk with her while she kept busy. When we were in grade school, and my mom went back to work, Grandma would keep herself busy by stealing clothes to iron from our house. When we'd walk to her house after school, there she would be finishing a huge pile of ironing to send home with Mom.
I remember hearing her talk about her faith, and how grateful she was for Grandpa's spiritual leadership. She said she never would have known God like she did if not for Grandpa. I don't suppose they ever did family or couples' devotions together, but they showed their love and devotion to each other and to God through service. They served their biological family and their church family as much as they could, and when they spoke about God and told Bible stories it was while they were serving. I really do think my Grandma saw all the activities she did as a gift of love to those it benefited. I don't think she did it because she couldn't stand a dirty house, or couldn't stand to sit still. She did it because she felt that it was the right thing to do for her family.
I guess I can't say that Grandma was always working in her home, because she also loved to shop. If she didn't have a reason to get a new outfit for herself of Grandpa, she would buy one for some other member of the family. Often times when there was a special occasion, she would want to take Mom and I shopping for a special outfit. It was part of the joy of preparing for and anticipating the event.
Of course, Grandma had her quirks and we all got annoyed at her, as she did at us, from time to time. Every Sunday morning at church during my high school years, she would ask me where my lipstick was if I wasn't wearing any (which I usually wasn't). When I went through my "grunge" clothing phase she was pretty horrified, especially when I dyed my hair dark red for a while. During this time, I had a particular cardigan sweater and a particular polyester shirt, both from a secondhand store, that she would constantly ask me to get rid of. When I was younger, and I guess the ironing had run out at our house, she tried cleaning my room a few times. That became a major conflict between us for a while, but we moved past it. As I got older, I began to understand more of what I considered her quirks, and to appreciate her strong points.
The funeral will be on Friday. I thank God that she was my grandma, and I thank Him that she believed in Him.
I remember as a child thinking that my grandparents just couldn't die - I couldn't fathom it, they were such a big part of my life. We saw my maternal grandparents almost every day, and they added richness to our lives and upbringing. As I've gotten older, and now have my own husband and children, I can see that of course it is the natural course of things that our grandparents aren't a part of our lives on this earth forever. However, my memory of her, and also of my grandpa who passed away a few years ago, will continue to impact me for the rest of my life.
Grandma served her family with all of her energy. She kept an immaculate house. As I mentioned, I was there almost every day growing up, and it was never in any way messy or dirty. She worked to create a peaceful atmosphere in her home, and the peace there was tangible. She cooked every meal, and made almost everything from scratch. I remember watching her roll out dough for homemade noodles, cinammon rolls, fig cookies, and pie crusts on her kitchen table. We all gathered around that table to visit and laugh - because there was always laughter when the family gathered around her table - and inevitably, to eat whatever goodies or meal she was cooking. Her home was inseparable from who she was, and when I think of her I almost always think of her in that context. When I think of how I want my home to be, I model it after her.
Grandma never sat down. This would, at times, annoy members of the family who wished she would allow herself to relax, maybe watch a show or play a game with the family. But instead, we gathered around her table to talk with her while she kept busy. When we were in grade school, and my mom went back to work, Grandma would keep herself busy by stealing clothes to iron from our house. When we'd walk to her house after school, there she would be finishing a huge pile of ironing to send home with Mom.
I remember hearing her talk about her faith, and how grateful she was for Grandpa's spiritual leadership. She said she never would have known God like she did if not for Grandpa. I don't suppose they ever did family or couples' devotions together, but they showed their love and devotion to each other and to God through service. They served their biological family and their church family as much as they could, and when they spoke about God and told Bible stories it was while they were serving. I really do think my Grandma saw all the activities she did as a gift of love to those it benefited. I don't think she did it because she couldn't stand a dirty house, or couldn't stand to sit still. She did it because she felt that it was the right thing to do for her family.
I guess I can't say that Grandma was always working in her home, because she also loved to shop. If she didn't have a reason to get a new outfit for herself of Grandpa, she would buy one for some other member of the family. Often times when there was a special occasion, she would want to take Mom and I shopping for a special outfit. It was part of the joy of preparing for and anticipating the event.
Of course, Grandma had her quirks and we all got annoyed at her, as she did at us, from time to time. Every Sunday morning at church during my high school years, she would ask me where my lipstick was if I wasn't wearing any (which I usually wasn't). When I went through my "grunge" clothing phase she was pretty horrified, especially when I dyed my hair dark red for a while. During this time, I had a particular cardigan sweater and a particular polyester shirt, both from a secondhand store, that she would constantly ask me to get rid of. When I was younger, and I guess the ironing had run out at our house, she tried cleaning my room a few times. That became a major conflict between us for a while, but we moved past it. As I got older, I began to understand more of what I considered her quirks, and to appreciate her strong points.
The funeral will be on Friday. I thank God that she was my grandma, and I thank Him that she believed in Him.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
names...
So far, we have chosen two Biblical names for our sons, ones that also happen to be very popular right now. (We certainly didn't choose them because they were popular, we discovered that detail later.) So, what do we name the third son?
Here are some Biblical names for boys, in no particular order:
Noah
Abraham
Elijah
Isaiah
Jeremiah
Issac
Daniel
David
Joseph
Benjamin
Matthew
Andrew
James
Thomas
John
Peter
Thaddeus
Paul
Luke
Levi
Samuel
Timothy
Stephen
I suppose we don't have to choose another Biblical name, but it seemed to be fitting since that is what the other two boys have. I know we have 4-5 more months to choose, but now that we know the gender it seems somehow urgent... I guess it's part of my nesting instinct kicking in?
Here are some Biblical names for boys, in no particular order:
Noah
Abraham
Elijah
Isaiah
Jeremiah
Issac
Daniel
David
Joseph
Benjamin
Matthew
Andrew
James
Thomas
John
Peter
Thaddeus
Paul
Luke
Levi
Samuel
Timothy
Stephen
I suppose we don't have to choose another Biblical name, but it seemed to be fitting since that is what the other two boys have. I know we have 4-5 more months to choose, but now that we know the gender it seems somehow urgent... I guess it's part of my nesting instinct kicking in?
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
cared for well
I have been sorting through big plastic tubs of baby and little boy clothes today. I had forgotten how many adorable clothes we had for Jacob and Ethan. I feel so blessed that my two older boys both got to wear many of those clothes, and now even a third baby will benefit! I am especially grateful when I come across an outfit that was only worn one or two times by one of the boys. The amazing thing, as I was sorting through the clothes, was realizing anew that almost all were given to us by friends and family. I saw one inexpensive set of three newborn gowns that we bought for Jacob, and another inexpensive set of five 9-12 month size onesies* we bought. That is all the clothes that we bought for the whole first year! The same goes for most of our baby gear, almost all being given to us; although we did buy ourselves a few things after the babies were here, when we knew more about what we needed (or thought we needed).
It reminds me of the verse that says, "If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." 1 Timothy 5:8. When we had Jacob and Ethan, we didn't have any money saved to buy baby stuff, but our biological and spiritual families made sure we were taken care of, even better than we would have taken care of ourselves.
I'm soaking some of the clothes that came out of storage with yellow spots around the collars. I have heard of this phenomenon before; you put clothes away apparently clean, but old stains rise to the surface while they are in storage. They are probably milk stains. Any suggestions on how to get them out? I am just soaking with detergent and hot water now since I was out of oxi-clean.
*As a side note . . . when I was pregnant with Jacob, Heath thought that the word "onesies" was a made-up word that only my family used. (In case you thought the same, I'll clarify that it is the trademark name for Gerber Baby bodysuits.) This doesn't say anything about Heath, since most men who don't yet have children (and probably many who do) wouldn't know where the word came from. Rather, it says something about my family and our made up words. :-)
It reminds me of the verse that says, "If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." 1 Timothy 5:8. When we had Jacob and Ethan, we didn't have any money saved to buy baby stuff, but our biological and spiritual families made sure we were taken care of, even better than we would have taken care of ourselves.
I'm soaking some of the clothes that came out of storage with yellow spots around the collars. I have heard of this phenomenon before; you put clothes away apparently clean, but old stains rise to the surface while they are in storage. They are probably milk stains. Any suggestions on how to get them out? I am just soaking with detergent and hot water now since I was out of oxi-clean.
*As a side note . . . when I was pregnant with Jacob, Heath thought that the word "onesies" was a made-up word that only my family used. (In case you thought the same, I'll clarify that it is the trademark name for Gerber Baby bodysuits.) This doesn't say anything about Heath, since most men who don't yet have children (and probably many who do) wouldn't know where the word came from. Rather, it says something about my family and our made up words. :-)
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
It's a . . . !
 |
| From Sonogram |
When we called to ask a question at the sonogram place this morning, they said the usual technician was not in today, that it was a substitute. We thought, "Oh no, someone inexperienced!" It turns out it was the opposite; she was very experienced, having been a high-risk pregnancy sonographer previously. She talked us through everything she was checking - 3 different parts of the brain, different parts of the heart including all 4 valves, kidneys, bladder, stomach, arms, legs, feet, fingers, spine, and finally, the private parts. :-) As you can see, our baby boy made it quite obvious what his gender is!
I am very excited to be able to prepare the clothes and room for our new one's arrival. The boys are excited that they will have a baby brother. Thank you, Lord, for this new life and new member of our family who we will soon get to meet face to face!
Friday, January 05, 2007
ultrasound Tuesday!
Today I went to the OB for my monthly appointment, and we scheduled our ultrasound for Tuesday at 10 a.m.! Yay, I can hardly wait! I hope the gender is easy to see. Just 4 more days to wait....
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