[School] Year in Review

     WE DID IT!
     We've finished an entire school year of homeschooling!
     It has been a satisfying year, overall. I've gotten to pursue an educational program for my kids that is more in line with my personal philosophy. One of the mantras that has kept me steady when I begin to doubt our choice or worry about whether or not the boys are in the best environment for them day-in and day-out: "Keep the end in mind." Is it necessary that my kids spend 7.5 hours a day in a controlled, scheduled, carefully designed environment in order to someday be successful adults? I would answer, emphatically, "no." At the end of the school year, does it matter whether they spent 1080 instructional hours on curriculum that is carefully designed to cover a thoroughly-researched and well-defined list of age-appropriate knowledge and skills and which uses research-proven methods of instruction and reinforcement -- or whether they actually obtained the age-appropriate knowledge and skills? I hope that most people would agree that actually having the knowledge and skills is more important than putting in a set number of hours on the specific lessons or activities that are supposedly needed to obtain them.
     In general, I respect the philosophy behind our public school system, the standards that exist, and the curriculum and methods that have grown out of those standards. It's pretty impressive, really, and works very well for a huge number of kids. Unfortunately, it did not work well for mine. They greatly struggled to go with the flow of a typical classroom. Their stress and my stress were both increased by constant contact from teachers and administrators and pressure to somehow make them "do better," i.e. to override their natural way of functioning in order to fit into the classroom mold. As if that was something we could force to happen! Finally, after trying to make them fit the mold for several years, I gave in to the reality that it wasn't necessary.
     Now, I'm relieved that they aren't being made to feel less-than their classmates who learn and live life differently. The way that people with ADHD view and approach the world is certainly different from the average person, but that doesn't mean it can't be a valid or beneficial way to live and see the world. Many adults learn to channel the positive aspects of their ADHD-brains and reduce or compensate for areas of weakness, and they choose occupation and hobbies that build on their strengths. However, in the traditional school setting, it is constantly reinforced that the behavior patterns most challenging to ADHD kids are the most important to master, and conversely, that the strengths common to ADHD kids aren't very important or valuable. It is hard to feel anything other than inadequate when receiving continual negative feedback and unavoidable, unflattering comparison to peers who seem to have mastered the highly-valued classroom behavior expectations so effortlessly.
     One result of the pressure from teachers and administrators to "fix" our kids was that we frequently changed or added medications and increased dosages. As a result, Ethan was on appetite-reducing medicines for so much of the time that he didn't gain any weight for two years. He gained height but no weight. I didn't realize how skinny he was looking by the end of last school year until I came across this picture from May of 2014, at the Derby kite festival:

 

and this one from earlier the same month:

Compare those to this picture of him on a home-school field trip in November of 2014:

And this one from April of 2015 (in which he was exhausted after another day of flying kites, coincidentally):

     I don't know if you can see what a difference a little meat on his bones has made, but I certainly can! He's filled out so much that we looked up his BMI to make sure it wasn't going too far in the other direction. Nope! Just a healthy, but not stick-thin, kid. On the other hand, it has been difficult to get him to exercise or remain active being at home all the time. He was forced to be active for at least 30 minutes or so each day at school (allegedly ;-) ), plus whatever active play he might get in the evening after school. So in one sense, he's healthier physically because his body is obviously getting more nutrients and building blocks it needs to grow; but in another sense, he may be somewhat less healthy physically because he isn't consistently engaging in daily exercise. Still, I could probably enforce a daily exercise program while homeschooling with less effort and more effectiveness than we could possibly expect from sending him back to public school and attempting to maintain a continual healthy weight gain. Beside that, I'm not actually sure if he got more exercise while attending public school than he does while homeschooling. It's hard to keep track, and I don't have a definitive baseline for comparison even if I did keep track. I conclude that is has been better for his health, overall, with the caveat that we need to pursue more daily exercise to maximize the benefits.
     So, I believe this year has been better for my kids' mental and emotional health as well as their physical health. I hope that at minimum, they have ended the school year with the knowledge and skills they would have netted from this year of public school. Ideally, they will have ended the school year with additional exposure to and appreciation for good literature than they might have gotten in public school and additional time spent pursuing their particular interests, especially in science and history. Further discussion of those specifics can wait for another post. :-)

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     So, I've decided that maybe Facebook isn't so great, that blogging and reading other people's blogs might be the better way to socialize online. Did the novelty of Facebook wear off? At one point, I thought Facebook might replace personal blogging altogether. It was so much easier to post a group of pictures or a news update on Facebook to get wide exposure. Even contemplative or complicated discussions could be undertaken via status updates and comments. However, once Facebook started cluttering our feeds with ads and "suggested articles" and limiting how we could display our friends' content, it seemed that everyone began primarily re-posting other people's content rather than producing their own. It turned into a marketing machine (as was originally envisioned, I suppose) rather than a chance to genuinely and authentically communicate with people you may not see very often. So, I sort of hate it now, although I do still love seeing everyone's pictures (real, actual photos of the person or their loved ones -- not reposted memes) and hearing important or interesting updates.
      In any case, I've decided to spend my online social time on blogs instead, after a long hiatus. I may have a lot to catch up on in all of your blogs, but I'm sure I will enjoy it. Stay tuned for riveting upcoming posts about homeschooling, the adventure of having a teenager (coming this June!), and possibly even some spiritual topics. ;-)